"I really don’t want to shower but I want to be clean" an autobiography
"Now that I’m in the shower I really dont wanna get out" a sequel
"Now that I’m out, I don’t want to put on clothes" the spin-off
"I’m sitting here in my towel and I must have showered 2 hours ago" the self help booklet
i want to shower but the past two times ive gone in there there was a hugeass hairy spider in the shower
After seeing a strange but convincing post on her dash, Sarah decides to test its theory. She begins holding her breath—an easy task for a first-chair clarinet—and carefully clicks “reblog”. The post becomes lighter as the loading icon appears, spinning in the center like the circle of life itself. Suddenly, her computer shuts down as it runs out of battery. The girl frantically begins searching for her laptop charger, still holding her breath with a determined will. She won’t lose this fight. As her computer begins to turn on, she pounds the wall beside her in frustration as she notices the Windows mandatory update screen—once a simple annoyance, it is now the key that seals her fate. “Come on, come on!” she whispers, afraid to use up too much of her precious air supply, now dwindling as the percentage slowly increases. 35%. Her lungs are on fire, but she cannot give up. 50%. Black spots begin to cloud her vision. 70%. Feeling faint, she leans back and tries to keep her racing mind focused on the task at hand. 85%. Mere seconds remain. 99%. … Just as it hits 100%, her screen comes to life, but the girl can’t take it anymore and promptly passes out, knocking over the poorly-placed lit candle on her dresser. It ignites the pile of school papers on the ground, and within minutes the whole house is ablaze. Fortunately, Sarah lives alone, and only one life is taken in the tragic accident. It’s a shame that she put so much trust in the internet with such a personal matter as kissing. Perhaps she should’ve just asked her girlfriend instead, thus saving all of this trouble.
I did a thing
I’ve been waiting my whole life for this post to happen.
You must be pretty young if you waited your whole life for this.
My friend didn’t realize her new 3DS came with a free LBW download, so she gave me the extra code (not realizing that I also bought the special edition 3DS oops) SO I’M GIVING THE CODE AWAY!
That’s right, a free copy of Link Between Worlds. And it’s a digi-download, so you don’t have to wait a month for me to get around to shipping you a physical copy.
Basically reblog and like this as much as you want I’ll select a winner in 48 hours!
I Was Trying To Be Funny But It Came Out as Really Mean: A 5-part documentary starring me.
I Was Trying To Be Loving And Supportive But I Probably Overstepped My Boundaries And Came Off as Creepy: a feature-length film with two sequels and a TV series adaption.
I Was Trying To Tell You I Relate To Your Difficult Situation But It Probably Sounded Like I Was Making It All About Me: a novel saga with several side book adaptions and a movie.
THESE CATS SOUND LIKE EVIL INCARNATE
This is the ocelot, whose “roar” has been described as a mixture between a motorcycle and satan.
most metal sounding cat ever
is…is it purring?